“Abolition” in the name of the project refers to the abolition not just of certain aspects of white supremacy, but of white supremacy itself. (I learned to use “abolition” this way from Resmaa Menakem). “In the bones” is meant to signify that white supremacy lives in our bodies, and that dismantling it requires a body-centered (rather than solely intellectual) approach.
The name of the project also refers to the idea that the abolition of slavery was never completed—freedpeople never received their “40 acres and a mule,” and the Thirteenth Amendment allows literal enslavement to continue to this day. Indigenous genocide also continues to this very day in the form of continuing land grabs, Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women, and industrial destruction of sacred sites and waterways—see recently Biden’s refusal to block the Dakota Access Pipeline, despite his campaign promise; he also backed the construction of Line 3, which is also desecrating sacred sites and polluting Indigenous land (of course, it’s all Indigenous land). It just never stops.
Meanwhile, the white supremacist dominance that powers and justifies slavery and genocide continues to live within us, within white people. We cannot think or intellectualize away these dominant urges. They are in our bones. We must meet ourselves here, in the body, and do our work, or we will surely continue to be a part of the harm that continues.
some things this project is NOT...
- therapy (though therapy is recommended – we may excavate deep stuff you’ll want to take to therapy).
- a corporate gaslighting tool (for telling you the company is working on their shit when they’re not)
- an attempt to talk or think our way out of white supremacy
- a feel-good navel-gazing festival with no concrete benefit / no engagement in the work of liberation for all
- a way to be certified or credentialed as Not Racist
some things this project IS...
- a healing project designed for white people (but open to anyone)
- a journey into knowing our bodies and their participation in systems of oppression
- a movement into communion with the land, with ancestors, with ourselves, with all beings.
- a means of harm reduction in our interactions with Black, Brown, and Indigenous people and other People of Color.
- an offering of many modes of personal repair, as well as advocacy for collective reparations.
- a path to full engagement as collaborators for the liberation of all.
accountability circle
“If history has taught me anything, it’s that there’s nothing more disappointing or dangerous than a room full of white people,” DiDi Delgado wrote. She also said, “You cannot be a member of an oppressive group without inflicting harm on those you oppress. The objective for allies should be to inflict as little harm as possible. And the way to do this is through accountability.” (If you found this mind-expanding, you can join me on Ms. Delgado’s patreon here).
The accountability circle is currently three brilliant Black women who are compensated for helping me work on session content and review how sessions went. (They are anonymous because they did not sign up to be dragged on social media or anything like that). This way, my clients & I are not “a room full of white people” but rather, Black women’s wisdom is always with us. I invite any Indigenous people interested in being part of the circle to connect with me.
financial integrity policy
10% of all proceeds (not profit) — meaning 10% of each session fee — is donated to VOCAL-NY and Anpetu Wi (split evenly; learn more about them on the Reparations Now page). Any salary that ever manifests will be capped at 75% of my last corporate salary. The goal is not to profit from this career change.
If the project ever makes enough money to sustain itself including that salary, everything above that will be donated to these organizations (and/or other Black/Brown/Indigenous-led organizations for sovereignty & liberation).
land acknowledgement
I am twice colonizer on this land. The Canarsee band of the Lenape people once lived here, calling the region Lenapehoking. They survived plague, rape, slaughter, displacement, and residential schools and continue to live in communities locally as well as in Oklahoma where the white government forced them to go. I donate to the Manna-hatta Fund (which benefits the American Indian Community House) as a land tax and encourage everyone in Lenapehoking to do the same.
The second layer of colonization is that I live in a Caribbean neighborhood. Gentrification is a system just like racism is a system and it is extremely violent to Black and Brown longterm Flatbush residents. (If I had it to do over, knowing what I know now, I would choose the 2-hour Queens commute over the harm of gentrification). I encourage fellow gentrifiers to look for ways to engage with neighbors in activism and organizing against displacement. Equality For Flatbush (E4F) is a good starting point.
lineage
this project owes its existence to these teachers...
- Audre Lorde, who called us all to engage in the deep embodiment she referred to as the erotic. (Sister Outsider, “Uses of the Erotic”, which I first encountered in adrienne maree brown’s Pleasure Activism)
- James Baldwin, who called on white people to “learn to love [our]selves and each other” for the benefit of all. (The Fire Next Time, “Letter From a Region In My Mind”)
- Kwame Ture (Stokely Carmichael), who asked white people to leave SNCC with the instruction to organize ourselves (and the many people who have echoed this sentiment after).
- Resmaa Menakem, who explained that dismantling white supremacy means working with the ways it lives in the white body. I owe the phrase “white body” to him. (My Grandmother’s Hands).
- Bessel van der Kolk, who also taught the importance of the body in emotional and spiritual healing (The Body Keeps the Score).
- Pema Chödrön who taught me the core practice of five R’s: Recognize the urge to cause harm; Refrain from the harm; Relax into the feelings that arise and Remain with them as long as appropriate; Resolve to continue this forever.
- The novels and words of Toni Morrison, where white people’s spiritual death and emptiness is visible (and, the fact that it is not central, is a teaching in itself).
- Sonya Renee Taylor, who frequently calls on white people to reconnect to our own buried/hidden humanity & to engage in spiritual and financial restoration (The Body Is Not An Apology).
- Robin Wall Kimmerer, who calls us all to engage with the land and its beings as with interconnected relatives (Braiding Sweetgrass).
- Multiple teachers who lead the work toward Transformative Justice, and show us ways to bring those who cause harm back into communion and community. This includes Mariame Kaba, Mia Mingus, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, Ejeris Dixon, and others.
with deep bows and gratitude to these in-person learnings...
- Dr. Tenia Jenkins Powell’s brilliant, powerful, generous, and patient mentoring throughout the years when I was training to be a teacher.
- Dr. Angela Rose Black’s mind-blowing institute, “Disrupting Systemic Whiteness in the Mindfulness Movement.”
- Indigenous Focusing Oriented Therapy & Indigenous Tools For Living trainings, based on the teachings of Dr. Shirley Turcotte, and implemented by Dr. DaRa Williams, Dr. Isabel Adon, and Dr. Beatrice Hyacinthe.
- Hakomi online primer from Dr. Halko Weiss with the Hakomi Institute of Mallorca
- The Interdependence Project’s Meditation Teacher Training (2016) with Kate Johnson & others.
- The ongoing, profound, spiritual/ancestral body-mind offerings of EmbodiedHeartMind
- Erin Caitlin Sweeney’s Ancestral Healing & Remembrance with its antiracist & decolonial lens
- The indefatigable incredible Accountability Circle, whose many hours of counsel have been indispensable and integral, & without whom this quite literally would be impossible
about me
I identify as white, cis, queer, Buddhist / animist, abolitionist, trauma survivor / neurodivergent / disabled. Not necessarily in that order. I am a certified meditation teacher who has also done other trainings in body-oriented contemplative practices to help folks heal from harm.
I am descended from English colonizers on both sides of my family. Both sides have engaged in the work of white supremacy from the very beginnings of the English assault on Turtle Island. I first was called to antiracism work by several experiences I had thirty years ago, and have been on the path ever since. Every year I realize how colonized my brain still was the year before - how could I not have realized x, y, and z last year? I have also caused all too much harm along the way. I’m sure this will continue - growth and harm - but I will not give up - I will continue to devote myself to dismantling white supremacy as my deepest life’s work, for the rest of my life.
This project was born wanting to shift from my corporate job toward something more in alignment with my values—"right livelihood." When I was debating whether to move forward on the project (given the ethical concerns of a white person doing antiracism work as a business), a Black friend said, “If every white person quit their job to fight white supremacy full time, it could only benefit me.” So I moved forward. And here we are, with the Accountability Circle and Financial Integrity Policy to hopefully mitigate those ethical concerns.
about the art
The incredible art for the website and social media pages is provided by the incomparable Rue Maia Oliver. Words can’t express my gratitude to Rue for creating art that captured the sense of magical darkness, bone-deep wholeness, internal examination and creativity, and movement toward growth and blossoming, that I had imagined. Only – I could never have imagined anything this beautiful. Please check out Rue’s website where there are a lot of gorgeous prints for sale, and you can also commission art, such as an individual or couple portrait – any weddings coming up in your circle? Just saying. Buy great art, support artists!
get in touch
send a message
Here’s the contact form for sending questions, comments, feedback, whatever!